revives_u@gmail.com
Hi. My name is Helen. I have a daughter, born in 1995. I am a saved Christian. My road to making Jesus my Lord and Savior is winding with many gullies along the way.
I grew up agnostic. My mother had a horrible Catholic upbringing and became an atheist at a young age.
I have to think childhood abuse when she was age five contributed to her hatred of God and organized religion. My brother and I were raised with confused feelings of God and church people.
My mother told us the word God was just to create fear. She said God was a trick word. As a child, she was told by the priests that she was too bad to enter Heaven when she dies, and she would be sent to Hell’s fire for sure.
It makes sense to me that a life of hearing one is not good enough for God’s Heaven wouldn’t bring a person to knowing God’s love for them.
She was adamant that God should not be mentioned in public school. Because of the God word, she made my brother and me sit down when the other students stood for the pledge of allegiance to the flag. I was so embarrassed when I got stared down by my classmates.
‘CHURCHES ARE BAD’
I never went to church during my childhood and teen years. Like my mother, I associated churches with being bad.
My parents got divorced when I was a toddler. I saw my father just a few times a year, mainly during Christmas, Easter, and summer breaks.
Because my father was English and an accomplished actor, I went to England quite a few times during my late teen years, visiting relatives.
I loved England’s old churches. What beautiful ancient stone structures they were. The blown glass, and beautifully tinted colored windowpane designs were mind blowing. It must be magnificent to see the windows from the inside.
I can just imagine the sunlight creating a magnificent light show throughout the whole church.
As expected, I refused to go into the churches. What I wouldn’t give to go into them for a church service now!
SLAMMED WITH JESUS TRUTH
How I came to know Christ Jesus as Lord and Savior is a miraculous story that many may dismiss. I credit my brother for God finding me, although my brother was a bull in a china shop. He was saved at about age 23 after a near fatal drug overdose.
He told our family about his salvation and what we must do to get into Heaven. His approach was not the best. He became argumentative when the family challenged his hallelujah claims.
My salvation shows that God is everywhere.
God does hear every word we say. I had always argued with my brother about God’s existence. It didn’t help that my brother kept getting in my face to try to make me believe.
In the mid 1990s, I became so angry with his pushy approach, I felt I had one of two choices to make: I was going to punch my preachy brother in the face or seek out this God of his.
This may sound weird, but I went for a walk…and WALKED RIGHT INTO THE ARMS OF JESUS. BAM.
Full of anger at my brother one cold, winter night, I ploughed through two feet of snow toward the back of my mother’s large property. I spat out fowl language at this Jesus Christ. I ordered “Jesus” to prove his existence.
Suddenly, a literal beam of light that I could see slammed my heart. The force was so strong it knocked me onto my bottom. I could not get up. I don’t know exactly what God said to my subconscious, but the Lord God Christ put me in my place. I began to cry and I bowed to God. I opened my heart to Jesus and spilled all.
I prayed for about 15 minutes. All the anger toward my brother and God was drained away.Tears streamed down my face.
I told Jesus about my frustrations, my deepest sins. I asked for forgiveness and accepted His forgiveness. I will never forget this born-again experience. I am a child of God. The love Jesus shows for me is like no other love.
Until I go to Heaven one day, I will rejoice with my Savior. You might find this sinner’s prayer useful.
Dear God:
I am a sinner.
Others have sinned greater than I have. Nevertheless, I stand before you now as a lost sinner, deserving of Hell. I choose to believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God who became a man.
I choose to believe that He allowed Himself to be put to death, that He rose again on the third day and is alive today. The Bible says that Jesus Christ shed His blood and died to pay the penalty for our sins, and I believe that.
Father, I want to be cleansed of all my sins right now. I know that Jesus Christ died to make me right with God and that I am forgiven for all my sins and will go to Heaven when I die. Right now at (time and date)___________________, I bow at the foot of the cross of Jesus Christ, and I am dumping all of my sins there. And I mean ALL of them!
I ask that the blood of Jesus Christ wash away all my sins - past, present and future. I believe that the blood of Jesus Christ washed away all my sins - past, present and future.
I am sorry for my sin, God, and I accept your forgiveness. Right now, I declare that I am a Christian. I ask, Father, that you will make me aware of when I want to sin, and give me the courage to say No.
I ask, too, that you will help me understand the Bible, and to make the rest of my days on earth count for eternity.
I pray all of this in the name of Jesus Christ - my new Lord and Savior. Amen.
